Saturday, October 31, 2009

happy halloween

>I was the kid who dreaded Halloween every single year. As soon as my birthday hit I knew it was getting close... the haunted houses, horror movies, and just the general creepiness that fills the air. Don't get me wrong I loved dressing up ( barbie bride, a clown, butterfly...) and getting tons of candy. But I hated the feeling of constant fear I had in bones.
I remember in 4th grade one of the 6th grade classes set up a "haunted house" in their classroom and invited all of the school to go through it. When it was my classes turn I was so scared, especially when I noticed they were only letting us go in one at a time. I tried to think of ways to get out of it, without looking like a complete scaredy-cat in front of everyone. Then one girl in my class got too scared and started walking back... providing mewith the perfect excuse, I wasn't scared I was just helping out a dear friend. Well after minute of talking with her, we both decided we felt dumb for not going through so we made a plan to go together. It took some convincing but the teacher eventually let us. The whole time we went through I hid my fear, she would scream and I would say, "everything's okay sarah" "you're okay". I was really comforting myself in the only way I could at that moment.
For my 8th birthday I begged my parents to take me to the haunted forest. I didn't make it 10 minutes before I broke down into tears. I was literally so scared I just didn't want to move, so my dad had to carry me. (keep in mind I was not a small 8 year old, I was about the size of your average 12-13 year old) The whole time he was carrying me I sobbing and repeating, ''they are just people in masks''.
After that I refused to go through any haunted house for years and years. It wasn't until I was at Lagoon for frightmares with my family when I was like 17 that I finally did it again. They had all already gone through one while I sat outside too afraid to go in. When it came time for the second one I didn't want to chicken out again, so I braced myself for sure death and went through. When I came out, I was fine. I remember thinking, ''that wasn't so bad", because it wasn't.
I didn't go to another haunted house until last year. I was super scared before I went in, but by the time it was over, I realized I didn't get scared very much at all. This year I went with some friends to Nightmare on 13th. I was so scared before we went in, I was almost in tears. But, after just a few minutes inside I was starting to relax. I was at the front of our friends, holding the hand of a boy who calms me almost instantly. I had tons of fun! I jumped a little bit but I didn't even scream once, and when we got out I was laughing at myself for being so scared earlier.
I just love looking back and realizing how far I've come :)
Ps. Don't tell my brother I'm a zombie.

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