Wednesday, September 29, 2010

R-Reality

It's officially been a year since my very first blog entry. When I wrote "I'm at the beginning of something wonderful and I'm so excited to see where I go from here." I really had no idea that in a year this is where my life would be. A year ago I was excited to finally feel like I was really growing up and becoming the woman I would need to be for my future. & now the reality is hitting me that this growing up is a continual process, and I have to keep going.

20 was very good to me, even though I had times of great trials. & I have a feeling that 21 is going to be a lot similar... After our super fun day at Lagoon, we were slammed back into reality. I had to go to class at 9 am, then work at 11 am, & later school at 7 pm. I was so tired from the day before that I took a short nap before school... it was like any other day... almost. For some reason I had this anxious feeling that was increasing through out the day.
It boiled down to, I have two classes I need to retake before I can graduate. But only one of those is available at night next term, & my due date is half-way through the term after after that. I really just need to be done with school before baby is born. I work during the day, and because my schedule is based on the work schedules of all the mothers, it's completely random every week. Sometimes I work 5 days a week, and other times only 2... I don't bring home a lot of money, but it's still something. So after a little emotional breakdown, I decided that no matter what we were going to have to find a way for me to quit my job, & finish school while still being able to afford everything. We need to find an apartment that we can move into relatively soon... but it's kinda hard trying to figure out what we can afford. I've been attempting this whole ''budget'' thing, & trying to find areas we can cut back on our spending... it seriously feels so weird.
We really are doing this. We're growing up, & starting a family... part of me feels like this can't be reality I'm still so little, But a much bigger part of me is very excited for all this. A lot can happen in a year, next year we will both be done with school and LMT's. We are going to be young parents raising a baby for the first time... so glad I'm not going through all this craziness alone.

Here's some faces of me from 16-20.


6 days till our ultrasound appointment! :) I have a feeling we are going to have one sweet little baby, I seriously can't enough candy, or fruit, I have such an insane sweet tooth!

Monday, September 27, 2010

Q-Queen

Sunday the 26th was my day to be queen. We decided to celebrate my birthday one day early because we both had the whole day off. We got up early & then just laid around pestering each other until we both got hungry and decided it was time to go...
Then we drove around desperately looking for somewhere to get breakfast. I was just in one of those moods where nothing sounded good, it was super frustrating. We got all the way to Draper before we finally found something we both agreed on... IKEA! Neither of us had ever been there before so we decided it would be fun to just try it out. We got there like 10 minutes before the restaurant opened, and we weren't the only ones, people were lining up before the doors even opened-apparently it's a pretty big deal. They actually had a pretty decent selection of food whether you wanted breakfast or lunch. I got chicken fingers with french fries and mac & cheese, (yes I did feel like a small child). Nic got Swedish meatballs with lingonberry sauce, and mashed potatoes. We also got a piece of chocolate cake and hazelnut chocolate bar for dessert. It was all really good!

We finally were on our way to Lagoon! (an amusement park north of Salt Lake) My mom had gotten some free tickets from her job, and me & Nic weren't able to go when the rest of family did, so we decided to use our tickets for my birthday. I knew I wasn't going to be able to go on most of the rides, but I was super excited for the Ferris wheel... & it was closed :( But we still found stuff to do & had alot of fun.





Because it's fall they were doing their big 'Frightmares' thing and had a lot of fun shows. With chainsaws, monsters, and a hypnotist. The one I was looking forward to, Zombies dancing on a pink Cadillac wasn't there this year, which was a little sad.

They also have a huge fountain set up in the front of the park, and I thought it would be fun to get a few pictures of us by it. So I walked very carefully trying not to get too wet... but that didn't work out. Then we started playing around, and next thing I know we were both completely soaked, and I was freezing!

We then decided it was time to go, so I could warm up, and we could get some dinner. Before we left Nic bought me one of my favorite treats-a delicious caramel apple! I had to use the heater in the car to dry my pants before we made it to dinner-we ended up going to Pei Wei, so yummy! & on the way home we stopped at Coffee Connection for some frozen drinks with boba bubbles. Oh how I love those, and I haven't had one since I got pregnant because I'm very careful about my caffeine intake.
It was seriously such a fun day with my husband! He had no problem buying me all the special treats I wanted that I wanted. Even though it wasn't ''officially'' my birthday, he sure made it feel just as special :)

Saturday, September 25, 2010

P-Party

On Thursday we got to see little Olivia and celebrate her birthday along with many others who absolutely adore her! I was (of course) running late, and forgot to bring my camera so I only have the pics I 'stole' from Olivia's birthmom. (Thank You)

While she was eating cake we all went around and said one thing we love about her. Apparently it's a tradition for some families, I had never played this game and so I was nervous but it turned out really sweet. I don't remember what everyone said but here are some of the reasons why people love Olivia:

"I love Olivia because of the way she eats cake... it's magnificent."



"I love Olivia because she is the most beautiful birthdaughter ever!"


"I love Olivia because she's always happy, and it's a good sign for my future children." (me)


"I love Olivia because of her big blue eyes."



"I love Olivia because she must be one special little spirit to have some many people love her."



"I love Olivia because she changed my life."

Isn't she just adorable!

Me and Nic got her a hello kitty that we made at build-a-bear, it even has a heartbeat. & we have a mini one that we will give to our baby if it's a girl. We also gave her and her brother Bradshaw (it was his birthday last weekend) some custom hooded towels my mom made just for them.
She really liked that kitty that was almost as big as she is. :)

I feel so blessed to know this little girl and her family. I'm excited to see her grow up, and her personality to keep coming out more and more.
I was 17 weeks along on her birthday, and when our baby is due she will be 17 months, (cool huh?) So it'll be fun to see how they are different, and how they are alike.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

O-Olivia

Today little miss Olivia turns One!!

She's a happy and healthy little girl. & we both love her very much!

Olivia was a flower-girl for our wedding. (ignore the nervous faces)



I'm so proud of Nicholas for all that he sacrificed for her.

"It seems like yesterday has come and gone so fast...But the memories will last...If there's one thing this father knows the hardest part is letting go."



"Would she ever doubt the way I feel about her in my heart...If tomorrow never comes will she know how much I love her?"



"So I dance with Cinderella while she is here in my arms. 'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight and she'll be gone..."

We're going to her birthday later today, and I'll be sure to post pictures after. We got her some really cute gifts. haha


Happy Birthday Olivia!!

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

N-Nicholas

So I just realized I had only been saving my posts not posting them... so here they all are. Oh and 'L' will show up sometime... I promise... maybe I shouldn't have skipped it lol.

Husband Survey :)

What is his name?

Nicholas Ryan Farish

How long have you been married?

A month and twelve days

How long did you date?
We were together for almost 6 months, (including our engagement)

Where did you meet your spouse for the first time?
Regeneration-The college group at our church.

When did you first kiss?
In February, the morning after I got snowed in & had to stay the night on the couch at his friends house. He woke me up, and spent the next like four hours laying on the floor talking.

Who kissed who first?
He kissed me.. but only after I asked him, "what are you waiting for?"

Who asked who out first?
I just took him to Applebee's with me... there was no real asking. & when we were there he asked me if I would like to be his girlfriend

Who proposed?
He did. He asked me before we got the ring, and then after as well.

How old are each of you?

He is 23, and I'll be 21 in 5 days :)

Who eats more sweets?
I think it's mutual, we both have a pretty big sweet tooth.

Who said I love you first?
He did but I followed shortly after.

Who can sing better?
I would definitely say him. I love when he sings.

Who is smarter?
We're pretty smart, but he's quicker than I am.

Who does the laundry?
I do most of the time.

Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?
He does, it's the side closest to the door and it makes me feel safer. & I don't mind climbing over him in the middle of the night when I have to pee.

Who mows the lawn?
Neither of us do. We don't have a lawn to be mowed. But when we do, he will because he loves it... and I've never mowed a lawn.

Who drives?

It's about 60/40, he drives more often than I do.

Who is more stubborn?

Probably me, we both have moments, I just have more.

Who has more siblings?

Nic does, there are 6 kids (including him) in his family and there are 4 in mine (including me)
Do you have any house pets?
Princess Verucca Rio-Bluetiful.
What church do you attend?
Calvary Mountain View in American Fork

Did you go to the same school?
We do now. UCMT

Are you from the same home town?
Nope, I'm from Orem/Provo, & he's from Highland/Alpine

Who is more sensitive?
Me.
Where do you eat out most as a couple?
Taco Bell, and JCW's

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
Page, Arizona
Who has the craziest exes?
Haha hmm... I'll have to say he does.
Who had more boyfriends/girlfriends?
I dated more people, but he had more actual girlfriends.

Who has the worse temper?
Oh me... hands down.

Who is more social?
Nic, by far.

Who wakes up earlier?
Usually me, and then I pester him until he wakes up.
Do you get flowers often?
No, because I'm not really fan of flowers honestly.

How long did it take to get serious?
Haha... two weeks... maybe.
Who eats more?
Him!

Who’s better with the computer?
Nic...no doubt.

I've been so blessed from day one just to know Nicholas. I could not have asked for a better husband. While we go through this pregnancy, he has been incredibly supportive. When I'm being emotional, irrational, and overwhelmed he keeps me calm and makes me laugh. When I'm sick and miserable he does whatever he can to make me feel better. It's so nice to finally have my soul mate, my other half, the one I can lean on, and my shoulder to cry on.
I love you Nicholas!

Monday, September 20, 2010

M-Monday

Yes I'm out of order again. It's just on purpose this time... because today was just such a Monday.

I had a Sports Massage makeup and 9 am. It was fine besides the boy in class asking me ridiculous questions... That totally just came off as creepy. Then it was time for lunch, I paid way too much for the quality of food I got. Then at 2 I had a Injury Massage makeup. It went well I just super tired... Then I finally got to go home @ 5:30. I tried to take a nap while I was at home, but I guess I had way too much on my mind. & I had to return at 7 for my Russian Massage class, I am counting down the days that I will never have to do another Russian massage in my life... it is not even close to being my cup of tea. Some people enjoy it-I am not one of those. I dread every minute, giving or receiving, I don't like the timing, the strokes, segments... any of it!

After school we had to go to Walmart for some groceries, and get some supplies for a very special birthday that's coming up this weeks :) It felt like we were there forever! My feet hurt, and I was tired so I started getting super cranky... & then I finally got to come home.

I can hear my bed calling my name. sorry for this little vent.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

K- Kick (in the pants)

This Sunday i had a pretty big realization or 'kick in the pants' if you will. (Yes I know it's a stretch just have to fit it in with the theme lol.)
We were at church for a night of worship where Nic and my cousin both got baptized.

The last couple days before that I had been feeling extremely anxious. I don't know if that's the best word but its the only one i can think of... and I realized that deep down my real issue was that I kept thinking 'this wasn't the plan'/'this isn't fair' I was trying to pray for guidance but I had so many other things popping into my head. Then I remembered:
"Many are the plans in the mind of man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand." Prov. 19:21

So in all reality this is, and always has the plan. Every single second of my life.

Last year when I came home from being nanny, I knew what I wanted to do with my life. So in school when we had to tell the class all about how we saw our future careers playing out, my revolved all around this imagine of me being a young wife and mother. It's all I've really wanted for at least the last year or more... so now why that it's happening do I feel like this wasn't my plan?
I think it boils down to fear. (story of my freaking life.) I just need to remember that while my life may not be some magical fairytale, it is still absolutely wonderful. I have the Lord beside me each and every step, He does want the best for me.

So here's to the end of making "plans", and the beginning of following the real plan-that He has for my life. :)

Saturday, September 18, 2010

J-Jordon

When I was born nearly 21 years ago I was given the name, 'Jordon Anne Crane'. For Christmas 1990 someone sent us card and they spelled my name, 'Jordyn'. & my parents decided that was a much cuter spelling for a little girl. So from then on that's how they spelled my name, and that's how I learned to spell my name.

All through elementary school and up to 7th grade, I was still Jordyn on the records. No one seemed to mind that it wasn't my 'legal' name, they just let me be 'Jordyn with a Y'. In 8th grade we moved, and I changed schools while we were registering me for classes and such they told me I would have to be 'Jordon' on the records. I was pretty much devasted. I've always been Jordyn, I'm not a Jordon nor will I ever be.

I decided to just deal with it all through high school. I figured when I changed my last name when I got married that I would also change the legal spelling of my first name. So here I am now, married nearly 6 weeks and legally I'm still 'Jordon Anne Crane'. It has turned out to be such a hassle to change just one little letter, I have to bring in documentation showing that from the time I was young that was how I've been spelling my name. Luckily all my elementary school records and report cards say 'Jordyn', & the religion I used to be a part of also has my name with a Y. I have a file folder full of so we're waiting until after my birthday to go in and change my name, since I have to renew my license anyway. So cross your fingers that in early October I can legally be known as 'Jordyn Anne Farish'.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

H-Homesick

Apparently I don't know my alphabet very well... haha I totally skipped "H" Thank you friend for bringing that to my attention. It might be out of order but here it is, Homesick:



"You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now


Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know

But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same

Cause I'm still here so far away from home


I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now


In Christ, there are no goodbyes

And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that
I have
To see you again To see you again"

This song is so special to me. Last year I was in Moab with some friends, but I was still lonely and hurting. I was looking out at the clouds and I couldn't help but think of this song. I sat there in the front seat and sketched clouds along with the words "If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place." Most of the time I'm okay staying here and waiting but sometimes it just feels like so much of heart is so far away.

I-Insecure

I'm a human being & a girl so of course my life has been riddled with insecurities. Nic thinks it's silly and completely unreasonable those times I'm being insecure... in his words I have, ''absolutely no reason to be insecure about anything, even a little bit." But in all these different aspects of my life I have different insecurities.

Just being a girl causes insecurities, about the way I look and act. Am I pretty enough? Trying too hard? Too cold or too emotional? Most of the time these ones don't affect me as much. I know that I am an attractive woman, & whether I like it or not I'm pretty much super emotional so I might as well learn to embrace it. I worry about whether or not I'm "good enough", if the people I love-love me back, & if I even deserve the love they show me.

As a daughter I'm insecure about making my parents proud. I know that in the past I've disappointed them, and I haven't always lived by their rules... but I just hope that now, this path I'm on is making them proud. As a mother I (of course) have a million and half insecurities-but I've accepted that that is probably normal. I just need to remember that when I'm crying and thinking, 'poor baby, you deserve a better mama.'

There's the insecurities that come along with being a new wife am I good enough for him? Do I show him daily how much I truly am in love with him? etc... & then there's the few miscellaneous ones that are little more unique to our life. I of course have insecurities from our pasts, I feel guilty for giving so much to someone who wasn't Nic. There's been times where my pregnancy has made me insecure, I guess I just sometimes feel like to me this is a whole new situation and to him it's like 'been there, done that'. I've never felt a baby kick, I've purposely stayed super naive about the actual birthing, but he's been there, & he's loved a brand new baby with all that he is... But I've realized it's different this time, our relationship is very different than the one he had with Olivia's birthmom. We're married and so he's here with me to rub my back as I'm crying and sick, and to clean up the mess I make when I don't quite make it. Even though he already has a daughter, this is going to be his first baby that he will be able to raise, and that will grow up calling him 'daddy'. So I know that while everything to do with Olivia was very special to him, it will special this time just in a different way. & I see how much he loves Olivia he sacrificed so much all for her and I sometimes feel inadequate, like there is no way he could ever love me half as much, I mean she's practically perfect... & I'm far from it. He's reassured me that his love for me, and his love for her are completely different, and incomparable, he doesn't love one of us more than the other... It's just hard for me to understand but maybe when our baby is here I'll start to get it. He's a smart a caring man, I'm very lucky that I have someone who will stay up with me while I'm being irrational and emotional. He's completely honest with me, and will tell me I'm being ridiculous, and will help me laugh at myself.

"When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are"

In other news: Last night Nic was listening to the baby swish around & he was talking to it. It was seriously so cute! He asked baby if it was a girl then it should keep moving, then he listened closely looked up at me, & smiled. He asked baby if it was a boy it should stop moving, he listened again and looked up me kinda confused. I told him that meant we were having twins so he told baby if it's twins to move around like crazy, he listened once more, looked back at me and said, 'that's kind of freaky'. Apparently we are having boy and girl twins... haha not the most scientific test, but we'll see how accurate it really is. ;)

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

G-Goodbye

"Don't like good-byes, tears or sighs
I'm not too good at leaving time"


I don't like goodbyes, I don't even like see-ya-laters, whether spoken or otherwise. I guess I just don't the uncertainty that comes with goodbyes. The letting go of that person for at least some period of time...

I remember one time leaving my grandma's house & I was staring out the back window just wishing we could stay there longer. I was trying not to be sad, but as we started driving past Lake Powell, and I saw that 'Welcome to Utah' sign, I couldn't help but start crying. It had only been a little while but I knew I missed her so much already.

Since I do have such a hard times with goodbyes when the time comes I tend to be super awkward. When it comes down to the hugging and 'I'll miss you's, I just try to distance myself. I'd rather avoid the whole situation than open myself up to being vulnerable and emotional. So as people are trying to hug me and tell me how much they love me, I just give them half-hugs and respond with ''uh-huh... yeah'' I just don't want them to see me sad... I feel silly breaking down into tears even if we have plans to see each other in a few short months. And as soon as its all over and we're separated I begin to regret the crappy job I just did at telling them good bye. I wish I would just man-up tell people I love them, I'll miss them & I can't wait to see them again...

I want to apologize to everyone who has had to experience my awkward hate of saying goodbye, I promise to do better and let myself be silly & emotional-because really that's just who I am.

I miss you Baltunis', Grandma, Alexis, K-la, Nona, DVB&O Jackson... to name just a few.

Monday, September 13, 2010

F-February

This last February I met the man who would completely change my life. I knew when we met that he was going to be different... but there's no way then I would've thought 6 months later we would be married. & now this coming February we are going to meet a little one who will once again change our lives. It was just me and Blue, and in a few short months we will be a family of four. I can't even take care of myself... so please little baby be nice to me :)

Sunday, September 12, 2010

E-Everything

Everyone needs to see this! Seriously.



"Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place where I find peace again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light to my soul.
You are my purpose...you're everything.

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You steal my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you're all I want, You're all I need
You're everything,everything
You're all I want your all I need
You're everything, everything.
You're all I want you're all I need.
You're everything, everything
You're all I want you're all I need, you're everything, everything.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?"

There's many different versions of this skit on Youtube, this is just one of my favorites. It's not best quality, it's just the first one I saw. I cry practically every time I watch it. I guess it's because I can relate to her... But really anyone who has been saved by Christ from themselves and the world can relate. He's just wanting for her to come back all along... Even when she's about to give up, it's not too late. It's too late. & that's what I love most, He loves her, me, you so much... He can't wait for us to come back.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

D-Daycare

I recently began working at a daycare. It's just a small business that the lady I work for runs out of her home. & so far I love it! Sure the kids get bratty sometimes, & I have change tons of diapers a day... (seriously the amount of diapers I've changed in my lifetime has quadrupled since working there.) It all reminds of last summer when I was nanny I learned so much then and I'm learning a lot now.

I just love excited they all are about learning, in the next week or so I will start teaching preschool to some of the older kids, and almost every day they will ask me when we get to start or what I will teach them. Them being so excited about it, makes me excited, (& nervous!) The kids who are already in Kindergarten can't wait to go each day, and when they come back they tell me all the fun things they did that day. I catch myself thinking, 'well of course you did that everyone does that in Kindergarten', & I realize this time for them is special they only get to experience these things for the first time once. So I listen as they get all excited and tell me crazy jumbled up stories. Even the younger kids just want to soak up everything around them. I read the same book about colors at least 5 times a day, haha so fun!
One little girl who is only 2 blows me away with how smart she is. Whether we are reading a book or playing with toys she just likes to pick up/point at things and tell me what they are. She's really good at animals, and can tell the difference between a 'tickchen' & 'turtey'. In all honesty she is probably my favorite, (is that allowed?? haha). One day she asked me my name and now she calls me 'J.J.' or 'Jordy' I love it, it just makes me smile, and sometimes she calls me mama or mommy, which is awkward... But she's so cute with curly light brown hair and big blue eyes.

Oh and when day when I got there one girl said, "you look cuter when you come here again." I didn't know if she was saying 'Next time, try and look cuter, k?' or 'You looked cuter the last time you were here' But either way it made me laugh so hard that she was totally calling me out on being a little lazy that day.

It's so fun working with so many wonderful kids day after day. I love their imagination and how they just want to be loved, and they still have that pure, beautiful outlook on the world.

Friday, September 10, 2010

C-Communion

Communion.

While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying, "Take and eat; this is my body." Then he took the cup, gave thanks and offered it to them, saying, "Drink from it, all of you. This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins." Matthew 26:26-28

Communion is a special personal time with the Lord.

We are remembering Christ and all that He has done for us in his life, death and resurrection. It's a time to remember and show gratitude to the Lord for saving us, & for our daily blessings: "This is my body, which is for you; do this in remembrance of me." 1 Corinthians 11:24

When observing Communion we take time to examine ourselves. It's not to examine oneself to see if we are worthy of communion, because no one will ever be worthy of anything Christ has done for them. I think of it more of examining where you are on your walk with the Lord, and that firstly you do have a true relationship with Him. When I go through this time to examine, I also will take time to repent and ask for forgiveness.: "A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup." 1 Corinthians 11:28

It's a statement of faith. Proclaiming the work that Christ did on the cross to pay for the sins of the world, and because He has saved us and brought us out of our dead state, that He will come again for us.: "For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes." 1 Corinthians 11:26

Because Communion is such a beautiful part of our faith, me and Nic were sure to include that tradition in our wedding ceremony.

It was so special to be able to take Communion for the first time as husband and wife in front of so many of our loved ones. We were able to show to them all the commitment that we have to the Lord in our marriage. It was so wonderful to have that moment of Nic praying over our marriage and knowing that it was the two of us in a this relationship with Christ, I couldn't but be incredibly touched, definite tears of joy.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

B-Baby

I wish I could say that when I found out I was having a baby, I was thrilled. But my feelings towards babies, or more specifically me having babies, has been a weird rough journey.
I don't remember ever thinking about growing up and having a family when I was a little girl. I didn't play with baby dolls, I played with Barbies-Barbies who had boyfriends and went to prom, all the fun high school stuff-that was the only growing up I was planning on.
Sometime in my teen years I decided I was never having kids. I would maybe get married... when I was at least 30, and we would just enjoy each other-sans spawn.

I eventually started dating someone who very much wanted children. So I reluctantly agreed that if we ever got to that point I would adopt children and raise them... but I wouldn't birth them. He didn't like that. The entire time we were together-even though I really thought I was in love with him, I never wanted to have children with him. We broke up after close to a year, & we were doing the "just friends" thing (HA!)... and a few weeks later I had a positive pregnancy test. I had to decide what I was going to do with this baby. I told him, and he told me he'd support any decision I made, but he wasn't ready for a baby, and that abortion might be the best option. I disagreed and decided that I was going to carry the baby full-term, and but I had to decide whether keep it or place it for adoption... But neither of those things were in the plan for me. When I was only 7 weeks-ish along I miscarried.
After that things were starting to get put into perspective. Me actually having children became more of a reality. I came to the conclusion that if I was ever able to I would love to have children, either by adoption or birth... eventually someday when I was ready.

When I met Nic he already had a daughter, that had been adopted. As we started getting more serious we realized we both loved idea of having both biological and adopted children to call our own... eventually someday when we were ready. By the time we got engaged we had already started talking about baby names. Nic was pretty much excited and ready to start having kids as soon as we were married, I on the hand wasn't sure, when or if I would ever be ready. We decided to wait till we had been married for a year and then start trying...

Father's Day this year I took a test and was able to tell Nic that we were having a baby. He was instantly excited, sure he has times where he gets nervous, but he has such awesome faith that if God gave us this baby He'll give us the provision we need. It took me a little while to get excited because I was nervous, nervous for the health of the baby, and whether or not I was going to be capable of being a good mother. I was scared of miscarrying among other things...
But here I am now at 15 weeks, and I am super excited to have a little baby to call my own. A few days ago we were able to hear the heartbeat, and it made me scared to think of the little miracle I'm responsible for. I'm very thankful for this opportunity to be pregnant, and to have a baby with such an incredible man.
Nic is seriously so good with kids, they just respond so positively to them, and he love love loves kids! Our due date is 2/26 which is one year to the day that we started dating, I'd love for it to be born on 2/19, one year after we met... haha it's so crazy, and this might not be what we were planning but God has bigger and better plans for us :)

In a few weeks, (10/5) we have an ultrasound and hopefully we'll get to find out the sex of our baby :D Sooo Exciting!!

Whether it's a boy or girl, I know it's going to be super adorable! I mean look at Owen and Olivia:

Monday, September 6, 2010

ABC's (Addicted)

I've decided to make my next 26 blog posts alphabet posts. Like titles in alphabetical order... haha it seems like a fun idea to me, and a little bit of a challenge. I'm also going to try and post 4-5 times a week during this challenge.

So here we go. Day One. A is for Addicted.

I am pretty much addicted to the following:

Dill-Pickles. (I love Boar's Head and Clausen's)
Soft-serve Chocolate Ice-cream Cones. (Especially from JCW's)


The Gate's (tv show)

Naps


French Fries (mm... Five Guys)


These Betsy Johnson Shoes... that have sadly been discontinued. Sad Day.
Vacation Dreams. (Paris, Disneyland, Hawaii, Alaskan Cruise...)





& of course Nic. HaHa...
I feel like a silly prego lady.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

The Wedding Day

Okay so I decided to make a post (with pictures) all about our wedding day. :)

I was actually fully prepared for everything to fall apart, but for us to just be beyond happy the entire day-because we started that day as Jordyn Crane and Nicholas Farish, & we would end it as Mr. & Mrs. Nicholas Farish. But seriously I don't think our day could have gone better-it wasn't ''perfect'' there were a couple hiccups... but I couldn't have cared less.

The day before we were running around finishing up all the loose ends we had left, & after that it was time to for fun. My entire extended on my dad's side was here, and we spent the night hanging out and enjoying each others company. Unfortunately, we didn't really get any pics that night, so for your viewing pleasure here's a pic of me at my bachelorette party... I was very tired at this point haha.

After a really late night, we were actually lucky enough to sleep in the day of, & not only that but after getting up, eating breakfast, and realizing we both felt a little ill, we were able to take a quick nap. I was woke up by my aunt Tasca telling me that at last minute the woman who was supposed to do my hair just decided to back out, and that she would now be doing my hair (she went to hair school). So we grabbed everything we needed and headed to my friend Alexis' house to get ready. Getting ready with all my bridesmaids was such a nice experience. We were just hanging out, doing our hair and makeup, there was no stress at all! Alexis even said something like, "Seriously think about this moment, everything just feels so relaxed and fun. You have to remember this Jordyn." & it's true I really do cherish those few hours I spent with my girls.

We all headed down the ampitheater where we were supposed to meet everyone, (our familes/bridal party), early for pictures. But practically no one was there... Luckily our photographer was and she decided to take some pics of me, (since we didn't have time to do 'actual' bridals.)



I helped our florist design all the flowers. I did NOT want roses. I was able to pick exactly what I wanted and he did an awesome job!



We also got a bunch of pics of me with my girls:


We decided to do our bridal party and family pics before the ceremony. But I still wanted the moment that Nic saw me for the first time, looking like a bride, to be super special. So we had a personal little reveal moment. So cute!



Here's The Bridal Party and Family Photos:






Ceremony:






Reception and Such:






These are just a few of our pics. I have a lot more on facebook.com/jcranefarish



Seriously the whole day was beautiful! We were nervous about it being outdoors but it wasn't too hot, and it didn't rain. Nic forgot to bring his ring so my aunt had to drive back and get it really fast, we didn't bring out marriage license so we signed it the next day at church, & they started playing the wrong song when I was walking down the aisle... haha but it all totally worked out and I could not be happier about my wedding day! Which is great cuz I'll only be doing it once! The stressful planning leading up to it-was pretty mush worth it in the end. I am married to the most amazing man, & my best friend. I feel like so many cheesy cliches just came true. haha. Thank You everyone who has supported us!